It has been said that a man's worth can be judged by the quality or character of his friends. Or some such thing. I have had friends come and go, and what continues to amaze me, are the friends that return.
This introspective has come from an experience on facebook. Friends that I assumed were long gone have for some reason sought me out. Acquaintances from more than 10 years ago suddenly pop up to say hello. And while I sit and communicate with them through a bunch of ones and zeroes, the thought occurs to me...why?
Are we never content to merely exist within our own sphere of the here and the now, or do we always reach into our past for those people that had an impact on our lives, no matter how small? I am quite certain that some of them are only interested in accruing as many e-friends as possible, a sort of digital cheering section that may or may not justify any feelings of inadequacy, or dare I say loneliness. It would, however, seem to make sense that a person who has or had many friends, also has many friends in the digital world, and also that a person who is reluctanct to make physical contact can use this medium as a surrogate for intellectual contact.
We are all of us struggling for survival in way or another. Whether it be through the peaks and valleys of a personal addiction, the loss of someone close to us, or the uncertainty of what may or may not happen tomorrow. Some of us face our day to day challenges almost as an afterthought, as things seem to stay on a pleasant course for awhile. But unfortunately, as the odds even out and the math catches up to us, we will face a day where our protective shell is stripped rather forcefully away from us, to lay bare before us that which is most vulnerable, and personal. It is the few people that dwell there with us, in our innermost Holy of Holies that are the blessed few to grab our hand and pull us up out of the black mire that seems to have an endless appetite for our suffering. It is those blessed few who offer of themselves completely and without guile. It is those blessed few who seem to find us at just the right moment, those that we can truly call "friend".
A man was walking along a dirt road one night and was having trouble finding his way. Before he knew it, he was slipping and falling and landed at the bottom of very deep and dark pit. He could not see and tried again and again to scramble his way up the side of the pit. But the rocks were jagged, and the dirt and mud too loose to support him. He called for help all night long, but none came.
In the morning, he woke to the sound of footsteps drawing nearer to the edge of the pit. He yelled for help, and a man appeared on the lip of the pit. "Hey!," yelled the man, "can you help me out of here?! I've been here all night!" Upon closer inspection the man noticed that it was a priest looking back down at him. The priest said, "I will say a prayer for you," and walked away. The man in the pit yelled and yelled but the priest did not return. Nobody came by the rest of the day and the man spent another cold and lonely night in the dark pit. He tried to climb out again but had to stop when his fingers started to bleed.
The next morning, the man again awoke to the sound of someone's footsteps drawing near the pit. With a slightly hoarse voice the man yelled for help. A doctor appeared at the lip of the pit and listened to the pleas of the trapped man. The doctor said, "I'll write you a prescription." and dropped the piece of paper down to the man, before walking off. Again the man yelled and screamed for help, but the doctor didn't return.
The man in the pit began to lose hope. Nobody came by the pit the rest of the day and now he was very hungry, cold and lonely. He spent another night in the dark pit and wished bitterly for someone to help him. As a last ditch effort, he tried to climb out again, but his fingers began to bleed again and he could not find sure footing. The man cried himslef to sleep that night.
The next morning the man awoke and heard nothing. He despaired and resigned himself to a miserable death, alone and afraid. As the man stared hopelessly at the clouds above him, tears streamed down his face and he thought of those that he would miss.
Just then the man heard footsteps near the edge of the pit, and with his hoarse voice barely able to make a sound, he yelled pitifully for help. The man's best friend appeared at the lip of the pit and said, "There you are! I've been looking for you for two whole days!" The man in the pit was relieved and said as best he could, "Can you get me out of here?!"
And with that, the man's best friend jumped down into the pit with him. "What are you doing?!" Said the man, "now we're both stuck down here!"
The man's best friend looked back at him, and noticed how his friend had been suffering. He saw his friend's injured fingers and the traces of tears shed on his friend's dirty face. He reached out and, with concern and love evident on his face, put his hand on his friend's shoulder and said, "It's alright now, everything is going to be okay. You see, I've been here before...and I know the way out."
This is for my friends, and most importantly, my wife, who is my best friend. Thanks for jumping into the pit with me.
----------------
Listening to: Loreena McKennitt - Beneath a Phrygian Sky
via FoxyTunes
This introspective has come from an experience on facebook. Friends that I assumed were long gone have for some reason sought me out. Acquaintances from more than 10 years ago suddenly pop up to say hello. And while I sit and communicate with them through a bunch of ones and zeroes, the thought occurs to me...why?
Are we never content to merely exist within our own sphere of the here and the now, or do we always reach into our past for those people that had an impact on our lives, no matter how small? I am quite certain that some of them are only interested in accruing as many e-friends as possible, a sort of digital cheering section that may or may not justify any feelings of inadequacy, or dare I say loneliness. It would, however, seem to make sense that a person who has or had many friends, also has many friends in the digital world, and also that a person who is reluctanct to make physical contact can use this medium as a surrogate for intellectual contact.
We are all of us struggling for survival in way or another. Whether it be through the peaks and valleys of a personal addiction, the loss of someone close to us, or the uncertainty of what may or may not happen tomorrow. Some of us face our day to day challenges almost as an afterthought, as things seem to stay on a pleasant course for awhile. But unfortunately, as the odds even out and the math catches up to us, we will face a day where our protective shell is stripped rather forcefully away from us, to lay bare before us that which is most vulnerable, and personal. It is the few people that dwell there with us, in our innermost Holy of Holies that are the blessed few to grab our hand and pull us up out of the black mire that seems to have an endless appetite for our suffering. It is those blessed few who offer of themselves completely and without guile. It is those blessed few who seem to find us at just the right moment, those that we can truly call "friend".
A man was walking along a dirt road one night and was having trouble finding his way. Before he knew it, he was slipping and falling and landed at the bottom of very deep and dark pit. He could not see and tried again and again to scramble his way up the side of the pit. But the rocks were jagged, and the dirt and mud too loose to support him. He called for help all night long, but none came.
In the morning, he woke to the sound of footsteps drawing nearer to the edge of the pit. He yelled for help, and a man appeared on the lip of the pit. "Hey!," yelled the man, "can you help me out of here?! I've been here all night!" Upon closer inspection the man noticed that it was a priest looking back down at him. The priest said, "I will say a prayer for you," and walked away. The man in the pit yelled and yelled but the priest did not return. Nobody came by the rest of the day and the man spent another cold and lonely night in the dark pit. He tried to climb out again but had to stop when his fingers started to bleed.
The next morning, the man again awoke to the sound of someone's footsteps drawing near the pit. With a slightly hoarse voice the man yelled for help. A doctor appeared at the lip of the pit and listened to the pleas of the trapped man. The doctor said, "I'll write you a prescription." and dropped the piece of paper down to the man, before walking off. Again the man yelled and screamed for help, but the doctor didn't return.
The man in the pit began to lose hope. Nobody came by the pit the rest of the day and now he was very hungry, cold and lonely. He spent another night in the dark pit and wished bitterly for someone to help him. As a last ditch effort, he tried to climb out again, but his fingers began to bleed again and he could not find sure footing. The man cried himslef to sleep that night.
The next morning the man awoke and heard nothing. He despaired and resigned himself to a miserable death, alone and afraid. As the man stared hopelessly at the clouds above him, tears streamed down his face and he thought of those that he would miss.
Just then the man heard footsteps near the edge of the pit, and with his hoarse voice barely able to make a sound, he yelled pitifully for help. The man's best friend appeared at the lip of the pit and said, "There you are! I've been looking for you for two whole days!" The man in the pit was relieved and said as best he could, "Can you get me out of here?!"
And with that, the man's best friend jumped down into the pit with him. "What are you doing?!" Said the man, "now we're both stuck down here!"
The man's best friend looked back at him, and noticed how his friend had been suffering. He saw his friend's injured fingers and the traces of tears shed on his friend's dirty face. He reached out and, with concern and love evident on his face, put his hand on his friend's shoulder and said, "It's alright now, everything is going to be okay. You see, I've been here before...and I know the way out."
This is for my friends, and most importantly, my wife, who is my best friend. Thanks for jumping into the pit with me.
----------------
Listening to: Loreena McKennitt - Beneath a Phrygian Sky
via FoxyTunes
3 comments:
Together we can do anything!! I will lead you out of places I have been before and you will lead me out of places you've been before. And for the places neither one of us has been before, we will find our way out together!!
I love you!! I am blessed to have you as my best friend!
You're AMAZING! Thanks for finding me and reconnecting. It's been an AWESOME Year having you and Sarah back in my "circle of life"! LoL
I LOVE YOU BOTH!! :o)
I think too...for me at least...it's less of "how many friends can I add to my list", and more of a way to bring back into my life a piece of those friends whom I always meant to stay close to, but because life continues on so quickly, I didn't. That's what I like about the virtual world. And being able to keep closer to those, like my Sarah, who I don't see as often as I like, but I want to keep forever. I love the story you shared...I think I'll share it with my mutual girls. I think too often, we think "I'll say a prayer for you", when there is much more that we can do...best friends or not.
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