The Mighty Peasant

Once upon a time in a very poor village, there lived a very poor man who worked as a stone cutter. Every day before the sun was up he left his small home to work at the quarry, and returned well after dark to spend a few precious hours with his family.
One night, as he was tucking his young son into bed, the man noticed a very serious look on his little boy's face.
"What's the matter, my son? What is troubling you?" he asked.
" When I grow up, I will not be a poor peasant. I will be rich," The boy confidently stated.
"Well that is good, "said his father with a slight smile, "and why have you decided that you will not be poor?"
"Because poor people are not important. People with money tell peasants what to do, and they must obey."
The boy's statement saddened the man, and his smile waned. He had thought that he had sufficiently taught the boy better values than this.
"I see," he said to his son, and was quiet a moment. "I think we shall have a different kind of story tonight," he said.
The boy brightened and sat up, intrigued. His father said, "Let's pretend you work at the quarry. You work all day chipping away the stone at the foot of the mountain and come home after dark. You are poor, but you and your family have enough to eat and a home to live in. You are happy. Do you still wish to be rich? Do you still wish to be someone else?"
"Yes!" insisted the boy, "I would be the Emperor! His servants carry him on a platform and all the stone cutters must bow to him!"
His father nodded and said, "Indeed, and if you were the Emperor, you would be very important. But, on a hot day, the Emperor must wipe his brow and be covered with an umbrella. Even he cannot command the mighty sun!"
"Well then I would be the sun!" cried the boy, "and even the Emperor would have to hide from me!"
"Oh wise decision, my son!" his father replied, feigning admiration, "and indeed you would be mighty! Oh, but what about clouds? A single cloud can block the hot sun's rays and give shade. Even the mighty sun cannot chase away a cloud."
"Then I would be a cloud!" replied the boy, "and I would decide who would get sun and who would get shade!"
His father continued, "And truly you would be important as a cloud! People would welcome you so that they could have shade! Oh but there is the mountain! As a cloud you could go where you wished until you came to the mountain."
"I would fly over the mountain!" the boy exclaimed, thinking he had outsmarted his father.
"Ah, but clouds can only fly so high and this mountain is too tall. As important as you are as a cloud, the mighty mountain still stands in your way."
"Then I would be the mighty mountain! And the Emperor, and the sun, and the cloud could not command me! I would stand in everyone's way, and I would move for no one!" The boy was triumphant, thinking he had reached the ultimate answer.

The father's face became passive, and he was quiet a moment. He then leaned towards his son and said almost in a whisper:

"But my son, you have forgotten about the mighty peasant, chipping away at your feet."

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Now playing: Loreena McKennitt - Beneath a Phrygian Sky
via FoxyTunes

A present for GM.

I've decided that I will give GM a gift. I don't expect much in return. Maybe just a new car every year for the rest of my life. I think that would be a fair trade for saving them don't you think? I realize I may be too late, seeing as how GM now stands for Government Motors, and if it really is too late for them to use my suggestion, then maybe some other car company CEOs can rub their skulls together and decide to use my idea. It's a simple idea, and I'll tell you how I stumbled upon it:
I was driving (in my reliable non-american brand name car) and my wife was sitting in the seat next to me. I came to a 4 way stop, or maybe it was a stop light. Ok what matters is that I had to stop the car for some reason and wait on other drivers. Before I decided the coast was clear enough to move along, in my right ear I hear this: "Are you gonna go? I mean Christmas is just around the corner."
Several miles down the road, I had to change lanes, I believe. I'm not sure what I did wrong, but I was informed that, "It's ok....I'm only on the kill side!"
It was at this point I decided that I was done driving and it didn't matter that the car was still traveling and around 60 miles an hour. I said, "Ok, I'm done." and promptly let go of the wheel and stared out the driver's side window in search of something else to hold my interest. The car traveled on, merrily careening down the road, first from one lane and then to another, then off of the road altogether, all the while my wife screaming something about look out for such and such and ohhhh no "we're gonna die!" and I'm sitting there staring out the window and covering my ears while chanting, "I'M NOT LISTENING I'M NOT LISTENING I'M NOT LISTENING BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH".....you get the picture.

Then we crashed and died.
All of this could have been averted had our car manufacturer made a slight modification. You see, I'm sure I'm not the only one whose wife has informed him that, "I'm just not equipped to ride in a car and be quiet about your driving." I'm also sure that there are wives who have heard the same thing from their husbands, although I'm also sure I'd be hard pressed to find that wife. I'm just going to say that in the interest of fairness, and because I'm sure I'm already pushing my chances of having to sleep on the couch tonight.
What is that modification, you ask? Well I'll tell you then:
Dual steering wheels, and another brake and gas pedal on the passenger side.
Think of it: The next time you think to yourself, "That's it, I'm done driving!" You don't have to sit there while your car barrels down the road and plays chicken with an overpass wall....you can merely scoot your seat back and let your passenger take over, while you relax in comfort and stare out the window and look for something else to hold your interest.
If GM had made cars with this little feature, they would be outselling Ferrari, I guarantee you!




(love you honey!)

Please do something to commemorate Memorial Day today.

My cousin, Greg